raining

its raining outside, its raining inside
its dark and then sun wont shine until you return
this morning I barely wanted to get out of bed
looked up at your picture on the wall
hurt to look because you are not here
im worried for you most of all
sat on the toilet, listened to old voicemails from you for comfort
hung on to and savoured every word
wish they were longer but i appreciate what i have
since i can not talk to you in live time
and I so badly want to hear from you
tell me you are ok
tell me they are not being too hard on you
I wish I was there but I guess I am in spirit
I hope you feel my presence
had all these goals today
somehow my motivation just faded away
trying to be strong
dont want to seem weak
just saw that I had an unvailable missed call on my phone
I wonder if it was you
wonder if it
was
YOU

I hope I get to see him on wednesday but I dont know because thats the day before thanksgiving and I am supposed to be out of my dorm room by 5 and the building by 7 and my parents will want to come pick me up altho we havent set up a time yet and then ill be in plano on thanksgiving. hmmm I cant wait til the day when we reunite but I can wait as long as they are treating you ok, as long as you are doing good and were one day closer now than yesterday. (*sad smile*,*sigh*)